Radio 1 DJ Greg James is in mourning. His beloved dog Barney died on Monday, after being put to sleep. In an Instagram post, James wrote: “I can’t really get my head around it. But he was peaceful, we were with him at home in the garden in the sunshine and I can’t stop crying.” He ended with: “Ps. Not on the show tomorrow obvs x.”

His message has been received with an outpouring of sympathy, but also some surprise. Because James is so heartbroken about the loss of his dog that he took time off from work. Not only that, but he saw it as so normal that it was an “obvs” situation rather than a big deal.

I relate. My cat Coco is the love of my life. The man I live with comes second – and he knows it. I feel just as similarly about her as James does for Barney, and while I’m lucky enough to not have yet found myself in the same situation as him, I know it’s inevitable.

Like him, I can’t imagine working during such grief – at least not in the immediate aftermath. But taking time off isn’t always a given. Bereavement for pets is not a legal obligation for employers in the UK because animals aren’t classified as dependents (clearly they aren’t aware of pet parents like me who refer to their canines and felines as “fur babies”). Instead, workplaces can offer informal leave or compassionate leave, but it’s entirely at their discretion.

The BBC is clearly one of those companies choosing to offer compassionate leave – something pet owners working there will doubtless be pleased to see. It could also help people working at less supportive companies. Being able to say the BBC sees leave after pet loss as completely normal is a good way to encourage another company to do the same.

I can’t imagine working during such grief – at least not in the immediate aftermath. But taking time off isn’t always a given

But the other problem is that employees don’t always want to ask for time off after the loss of a pet because, well, it can be embarrassing. Pet grief still feels taboo. Even though 97 per cent of 2,800 pet owners told the RSPCA that they were “truly heartbroken” after their pet died, 67 per cent added that they were shocked by the intensity of the grief they felt.

They probably didn’t expect the grief to be so strong because people rarely talk about pet grief honestly. In our society, it’s acceptable to say you’re “devastated”, “sad” and even “heartbroken” about a pet dying – but only when it happens. If you’re still saying that a week, a month, or heaven forbid, a year later, then it’s unlikely you’ll be met with much sympathy.

I know because pre-Coco, I, too, found it surprising when people were so devastated by their pets dying. “It’s just an animal – and you’re not even vegetarian” is a real thought I had in my early twenties when people would complain about intense pet grief while eating a lamb roast.

Now, I’m shocked by my younger self. Becoming a cat owner (or, let’s face it, a cat mum) has completely changed the way I see pet loss – and even pet relationships.

It’s why it’s so important to see James being so honest about how he feels about Barney. He has a huge platform with over 1.3 million followers on Instagram, and he isn’t just saying how devastated he is – he’s talking about taking time off work, and admitting he “can’t stop crying”.

When he came back to work on Wednesday, he continued to normalise pet grief, saying live on air: “Love that Barney boy so much, my God. I guess it’s the whole thing, isn't it? The price of love is pain, and my pain and my sadness is so much, because I loved him so goddamn much. He was so joyful. What a thing.”

In the past, he’s also spoken about cancelling a holiday to care for Barney after he had surgery to fix an arthritic ankle, writing in The i about just how much he loves his dog: “I miss him when I’m out of the house, I think about him when I’m doing something I don’t want to be doing. I wonder what he’s up to when I’m at work and I feel so sad at the thought of his stupid face not being there when I get home.”

This is exactly how I feel about Coco – and yet I’m often too embarrassed to admit it out loud, especially in the workplace. James clearly does not have the same qualms – he’s shouting his love for his dog to millions on the airwaves and social media. Maybe it’s about time the rest of us pet owners followed suit, normalising both pet love and pet grief.