Ping! It’s as though I’ve just received a text from the love of my life who has ghosted me for the past six years.

Harry and Meghan are packing up in California, along with several dog bowls and Le Creuset pans (though are retaining their homes in Montecito and Portugal), and heading back to Britain! To live here full-time, we are told – at least until the children have finished their education. What news!

All I can think of is, how soon can you get here? Will there be crowds of screaming fans at Heathrow, as if they are returning Beatles, tired of their voices going unheard? I hope so!

Let’s face it, we need the excitement. I am tingling with anticipation. Because, dare I say it, I am bored with the Prince and Princess of Wales. Queen Camilla is almost 80 and I am sure yearns for time to just potter.

Princess Anne deserves time off for good behaviour. Prince Edward and his wife (I’m sorry, I can’t even remember her name) are about as exciting as cold porridge.

Prince Harry and Meghan are packing up in California and heading back to Britain (pictured in Windsor after their 2018 wedding)

Meghan must be wholly on board: she is not someone who would leave the Montecito ‘garden’ without a very tempting, organic carrot, writes Liz Jones

The family is looking as threadbare as those tartan carpets at Balmoral. And, given the watery admonishments from the Waleses regarding the former prince Andrew, we need a gobby feminist such as Meghan in our midst to tackle difficult and unsavoury behaviour, someone unafraid to not always be smiling in a perfect frock and vertiginous heels.

In the midst of my delight, like all their fans, I have many questions, of course. Starting with why?

Given their hasty exit and suggestions of racism, boredom (on the part of Meghan), not being paid for the endless, dutiful shaking of hands (again, Meghan), frostiness from Kate (you get the picture), not to mention Harry’s unhappiness with his brother and father, hatred of the British Press and fears for their safety, why are they coming back?

I’m buying the official line and think it’s for the schools. Harry thinks our schools are ‘wonderful’, and wants a traditional British education for Archie, seven, and Lili, five.

Rumour has it they will move in to a private, non-royal residence not far from London. I trust no one even dared mention the word ‘cottage’ or ‘lodge’.

So now I’m wondering how far back into the fold they will come. Will we finally see the mop-haired Archie and barefoot Lili waving from balconies, and enjoying all the privileges and security that comes with a place at the heart of the Royal Family? Not to mention some help for their parents from the public purse.

Royal correspondents think not, but of course the possibility looms tantalisingly close. Personally I can’t see Meghan trying all that again, kneeling in mud talking to Scouts while being forced to wear flesh-coloured tights. No housewife, she will be running her As Ever brand remotely, so any official duties would need to be far more imaginative and close to the couple’s hearts.

Harry and Meghan were once dubbed part of the 'Fab Four' with the then-Duke and Duchess of Cambridge. They are pictured at the first Royal Foundation Forum event in London in 2018

I think it’s for the schools. Harry thinks our schools are ‘wonderful’, and wants a traditional British education for Archie, seven, and Lili, five, writes Liz

The Duchess has only accompanied Harry twice to the UK since leaving (for The Queen’s funeral and this summer the first time in four years to re-introduce Charles to his grandchildren), so while Harry may have his heart set on an Eton or Harrow, what has changed Meghan’s mind? Apart from the much-trumpeted financial independence turning to dust in the US.

And yet she must be wholly on board: she is not someone who would leave those golden beaches, that curated lifestyle, the Montecito ‘garden’, the celebrity mwah-mwahs, without a very tempting, organic carrot.

So, I don’t think she’s being dragged by her lovely hair, but she will have calligraphed a long list of demands. My gut feeling is what finally sealed the deal was the visit to Althorp (Meghan posted photos of what were thought to be the pilgrimage to Diana’s family home and the island where she is buried), which took place when the family visited England in July.

Meghan had been left a little cold by the crowds at her wedding, the E-type Jag, the Stella McCartney dress, the blasted Windsor cottage. But how could she not be wooed by the sight of that stately home, the parkland, the crisp tones of Earl Spencer as well as the warmth, the certainty, of being embraced by a family who although not Windsors come with hundreds of years of history too.

We’re told that Charles only learned of their return on Sunday – he is said to be ‘naturally’ pleased (pictured with the Sussexes in 2018)

And Harry? He will have thought just one word.

Home.

Perhaps this was the reason a jaunty Union Jack was flying next to him as he gave a speech last night, moments after this huge news broke.

How long have the negotiations really been going on for, I wonder. For there is also a nagging worry: has it all been a tad hurried because Harry is concerned for his father’s health? Is that the real reason: a mercy dash? A part of me also wonders whether this is an uprooting made out of genuine concern for his King.

We’re told that Charles only learned of their return on Sunday – he is said to be ‘naturally’ pleased – but what about William? Was he even given a heads up? Is he making that cross face again? The seismic move tells me Harry has finally grown up, needs permission from no one to live his best life, and is putting his own family and happiness first.

My worry is not how the general public will react on the inevitable (yes please!) public outings (we Britons are far too generous to hold a grudge), but what commentators in general and anonymous warriors on social media think of this new development. No hounding, please, no too-personal catty comments about what Meghan wears.

Meghan was warned by friends before her wedding that her life would be destroyed, that the British way of handling emotions is ‘probably damaging’. But I think she has matured too, grown a thicker skin that I pray she’ll have little need to wear.

She has also seen that the Waleses’ children George, Charlotte and Louis have been left alone for the school run, been able to grow up refreshingly normal while also enjoying the perks and none of the pitfalls of being impossibly privileged. Harry in turn will be able to concentrate on his charities (the Invictus Games are in Birmingham next year), and doubtless his old friends will rally, shore him up in a protective circle of joshing, raucous memories and humour that perhaps he found lacking in the US.

Harry and Meghan, we can be nice, I promise. This upping of sticks could be the making of us all, as well as adding some upbeat pages to the history books. You are being very brave. Hats off. And welcome home.