Q: I ordered a weak long black and a strong flat white at my local cafe, which then charged me for the additional shot of coffee for the strong flat white. Logic says there should be no additional cost since I’m receiving one less shot in the weak long black. Am I being unreasonable? T.C., Mosman, NSW

A: I ran your question past my daughter. She studied film and TV at uni, works as a neo-soul singer-songwriter, and lives in the northern hipster suburbs of Melbourne, so she knows everything there is to know about being a barista. She thought you make a reasonable enough point and, if you asked politely, most cafe workers would probably cancel the charge for the extra shot because most cafe workers aren’t paid enough to give a stuff (although some of the more pedantic baristas might refuse, maybe even leaving a couple of fronds off your latte-art fern to demonstrate their deep contempt for your three-shot pettiness).

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Personally, I’m not sure I follow your coffee logic. If a long black is a set price, why should you expect to pay half-price if you only want a one-shot version of it? That’s like buying a double-size bedsheet and expecting it to be half-price because you’ll only be putting it on a single bed. Nobody wants to be known as a three-shot whiner, so maybe the simplest solution is to amend your order.

Instead of a long black, order a short black with extra hot water, so when you order your strong flat white, you’ll be paying for three shots all up. You’ll be happy, the baristas won’t get peeved, and your latte-art fern will be bursting with fronds (with maybe even a tiny, frothy ladybug perched on the tip).

• guru@goodweekend.com.au*

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